As limitless as the sky

A message to my dearest : 

You know, during the past days. I was troubled, troubled about the distance in between us. I know you feel it too. It was once a natural thing for you to hold my hands, now its different. 

I miss your hands.

Even though you are right here beside me. I still miss you. 

Today, we were chatting about some woman wanting to marry a angmoh and we came to the topic about marriage.

I told you that I may not wanna marry.

and you asked why.

I told you that there are many problems when it comes to marriage. 

In my mind, I was thinking : Love is not sustainable; 

I din't have any faith. Ever if i had faith, is it really enough? 

I din't have faith in the love that was between us too.

To me,  I was the wrong choice.  

I felt like you will eventually let go of me. Like how the others did. 

Then I realized, my mindset was causing all the tension between us. 

I prevented myself from opening up to you. 

Subconsciously pulling myself away from you.  

I was the one who created the distance. 

partially because i was afraid.

Like you said, I thought about failure first; Thinking everything will fall apart before anything good could happen.

I caused my own fall.

Today, you made me realized what the problem was,

and gave me the solution. 

Now, I wanna do

and it is to make things better.

I will try not shut you out anymore.

I do not wanna have something so special slip by me just like that.

I hope we can make this work. 

I'm holding on, so don't you let me go alrighty? :)

This time I'll have faith in us. 

I've learnt a lot from you during this period of time.

Getting an insight in your perspective of life.

Somethings i really wanna see things through your eyes.

Maybe its really true that you are brought to me for a reason or more.

ps: Hold my hand!!! :D If not, don't be surprise if i grab yours X) 

CLAUDIA Y

A word consisting of 4 letters.